“Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the Lord swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth” (Deuteronomy 11:18-21).
Moses spoke these words to the Israelites as they were preparing to enter the Promised Land. They are actually a repeat of words found in Deuteronomy 6. In fact, Moses repeated many times the words “follow the commands,” “pay attention to these laws,” “observe the Lord’s commands and decrees,” and other similar words. Moses knew he would not be allowed to enter the land but it was his responsibility to make sure they understood the seriousness of God’s commands.
I know we no longer live under the Old Covenant but these verses are a strong reminder of the importance of passing on God’s commands to our children. The Apostle Paul says in Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Parents have the primary responsibility for this but I believe grandparents, other family members, and friends also are responsible for training and instruction of children in their sphere of contact. Oh, I don’t mean we’re responsible for sitting down with our neighbor’s kids and teaching them a lesson. I mean our lives, our behavior, and our words will influence children.
Sometimes our actions don’t match our words. I remember one incident when my girls were at the age of learning to drive. We were on the Interstate highway and I missed the exit. I immediately slowed down and pulled onto the shoulder of the road. As I began to slowly back up to the missed exit, I remember telling my girls, “do as I say, not as I do.” We laugh about it today, but what I did was not a safe practice. Fortunately, there was little traffic and we were safe. I wonder though, have I told my girls it wasn’t nice to talk about their friends in a bad way and then turned around and gossiped about a neighbor down the street? Did I teach my girls one thing and then turned around and did the opposite?
I’m sure all parents have failed to live up to what they “preached.” I always say I left a lot of empty spaces in my parenting and I’m grateful that God filled them in with his grace. The point is God has called His people to be separate from the world. We are in the world, but not of the world. God said to “be holy, because I am holy” (1 Peter 1:16). To be holy is be set apart for a purpose. God’s people honor and praise Him. The lives of God’s people must look different from the worldly way of life, even in parenting. May God bless all of you who are still raising children, and may those of us who are on the other side of parenting remember our lives still influence children. I pray that children see God at work in us.
Amen and amen.